Bittersweet truth

[... about finding the grail ... near the end of the search]

The search began many years ago
... the search led me through dark places
and through halls of light
I was seeking that elusive key
....the key that would open the door
.... if only I could find the door.....

I knew not what I was looking for
..... I only knew that I was looking

Over the years the damaged mind
that lived within me..... cringed....
It did not know that it existed
and while it existed, it placed chains
apon my search.

And so I searched for an unknown end
while wrapped in invisible chains....
What a disaster!

The inevitable failure fed the damaged ego
adding new chains to the load I carried.
.... and so it continued.....

.... until a "routine service" being perforned
one day upon my external self....
led the "serviceman" to suspect
that something lay beneath the obvious.

This led to two decades of delving and digging
into the hidden.... but not forgotten..... past.
And so we come to present time
when past wounds and pains
have been laid bare.....
.... the invisible chains are now in vain
as the inner and outer me
strive to join.... once again.

This the goal.... the aim.... the Holy Grail
at the end of the search...
.... to heal those wounds from long ago
and bring "me" to a place of rest. 

© Ian Croft April 2019